You Cannot Be Serious, # 71

Dr Faustus spots some problematic programming in an automated email from KCL’s IT Services. The syntax is not most logically ordered either:

We informed you that we believe your issued to be resolved on the [insert date]

Double-take, # 231

The Mangling English email provider is now sending mangles direct to the inbox!

This mangle is related to one covered in more detail in December 2012. The construction here uses a personal pronoun (you) instead of the reflexive pronoun (yourself) that is needed to express the idea of performing (as the verb’s subject) an action on oneself (as the verb’s object).

An explanation, with examples of correct usage, can be found on the Oxford Dictionaries website.

Protect you and your loved ones

Right word, wrong form, # 5

The wrong adjective on this root is used here to describe participants in a recent promotional email, which thus ends up accidentally insulting the other booksellers who use the Abebooks portal:

select for selected

Not Washed or Cooked, # 286

Bob Godiva received this in his inbox:

protal for portal

The Wrong Word Entirely, # 94

There seems to have been a confusion of concepts in this scam email. At least it says ‘message’:

Electric Message Center

Multimangle, # 33

Received by a surprised Dr Faustus, who barely knows where to start (mangle-wise, that is), but is especially taken by the use of apostrophes, which certainly does ‘look unusual for’ him…

O’k; embroider for embroidery; It may look unusual foryou; I live in a small city. but I would like to see the world; I love to walk around the pair; foto; Now, I’m end

Double-take, # 203

At some point in the last year or so, someone at eBay (or possibly ebay: both can be found on the company’s webpages these days) altered this word in the email notification template from the correct spelling to this mangle, ignoring the company’s own advice on checking spelling:

matche

Apostrophe catastrophe, # 104

Earlier this year, John Holloway received an apostrophe catastrophe by email:

camera’s for cameras

Not Washed or Cooked, # 262

Old Chelsea received this offer by email, and comments: ‘Honestly… Not even hidden in the small print!’ — where the word can be found several times, unmangled:

mangum for magnum

Apostrophe catastrophe, # 100

This mangle appeared in a marketing email sent to Dr Faustus by the Donmar Theatre. The full poster can presently be found online:

chair’s for chairs

Double-take, # 174

An excerpt from a much longer email received by Dr Faustus:

update your website in low fee; Greetings of the day!!; we serve more than innumerable companies ; unbelievably pocket friendly prices

Double-take, # 173

Received from Unitemps by Dr Faustus, and not mangling English so much as mangling in English. It certainly seems confused about how to express times, or at least how to express them consistently:

07:45am – 4:15pm OR 08:30am – 18:00pm

Not Washed or Cooked, # 237

As Dr Faustus has discovered, UCL — that’s University College London — has apparently dispensed with both spell-checking and proofreading in its email communications to its customers, resulting, here at least, in some frankly embarrassing mangles of words and punctuation. These emails both relate to the same ‘purchase’ or ‘order’, which is actually a booking, and it is notable that only one bothers with a salutation:

approriate; furture reference; details of your query quoting

Double-take, # 166

This is extracted from a genuine Google email, and is a useful reminder that a spell-checker can check only the accuracy of spelling, not the accuracy of content:

[email of 24/06/15 advertising Father’s Day offer ending 21/06/15]

The Wrong Word Entirely, # 81

There are various mangles and oddities in this extract from an email sent in May by eBay, including some missing articles and some illogical verb tenses. The key issue is the word ‘language’, which is used rather strangely throughout. The last two paragraphs in particular seem to require something more specific, such as ‘terminology’ or ‘terms‘:

additional language, new language &c; missing articles; incorrect verb tenses

Apostrophe catastrophe, # 82

Another Time Out offers mangle from the inbox of Dr Faustus:

ENOs for ENO’s

Now Try It In English, # 3

From the email (and backlog) of Dr Faustus:

your account has been disabled considered a problem […] please follow the stages of being able to return to your account […] Shopping worldwide hassle free […]. Please follow the steps To Update Your account limited now

Spellchecking Is Never Enough, # 177

Dr Faustus has sent this extract from an emailed recruitment circular, which demonstrates a failure to proofread, an absence of logical hyphenation and an abrupt shift in perspective:

a supervisors; third person to second person shift

Double-take, # 143

John Holloway felt that something in the email from his solicitor was not quite right:

responaw for respondent

Multimangle, # 13

John Holloway has sent in these extracts from an invitation to an interview for a job — as an English teacher!

syntax, punctuation, grammar, apostrophes, If you are planning on bring with a USB devise